As a Black trans woman, solo travel comes with more than just worrying if folks are pitying me for being alone at a bar. It often comes with anxiety — and for good reason, as anti-trans rhetoric and legislation continue to infiltrate communities across the country. But it took a trip to Charlotte, North Carolina, for me to realize that solo travel may not only become a standard in my life but something I prefer.
Author Marie-Adélina (bottom left) with new Charlotte Pride friends Ed, William, and StephMarie Adélina de la Ferrière
Sadly, I wasn’t prepared for the mid-August humidity. Arriving at the Courtyard by Marriott in downtown Charlotte, I was greeted by the friendly staff who quickly checked me in. I was equally greeted by the AC on high in the room as I settled in and peeled off my travel clothes. After taking a quick shower and applying my makeup, I was off to dinner at Spaghett, a cozy restaurant in Charlotte’s Fourth Ward. Tucked inside a historic mansion, I confirmed it was just dinner for one. Usually, if I dare to go out to a bar alone, I find myself staring at a screen to avoid potential onlookers.
This time, I challenged myself to keep my phone down, except to take photos or videos of the experience. And I’m glad I did. The meal was beyond succulent, the Spaghetti cocktail (a mixture of Miller High Life and Aperol) was surprisingly refreshing — and one of the few times I’d be caught drinking beer — and I was lucky to have enjoyed a solo dinner for once. Later, I danced the night away while visiting one of Charlotte’s few queer bars, Chasers.
The Spaghett CocktailJonathan Elyea/Unify Visual
My time in the city coincided with Charlotte Pride’s 25th anniversary. Fortunately, I had access to the VIP experience with an air-conditioned tent, though the journey there was excruciating in my Croc heels (I will never learn to pack properly!). The reward was mimosas and occasional smiles. But everyone seemed to be drawn to a trio of friends — Stephanie, William, and Ed — who were really enjoying their time.
Stephanie (Steph for short) was a magnet for attendees, wearing a platinum blond wig, a rainbow-colored dress, and several pins that included affirming and cheeky sayings. Within an hour of her turning around and introducing herself, we became instant friends. We spent the weekend together, laughing and getting to know each other, and she helped me walk as I painfully but stoically managed to maintain my balance.
Charlotte Pride 2025courtesy Charlotte Pride
We all experience a form of fear when it comes to trying something new. Choosing a new hair color, relocating to a new city, or trying a new dish. For me, it was the fear of solo traveling as a Black trans woman. But this trip was a reminder that fear is the greatest enemy of freedom — and never let fear take hold of your flight destination.
In the end, I had excellent food, fantastic memories, and a new set of fun “nice mean Southerner” friends to call on when this queen revisits the Queen City.
This trip was funded by the Charlotte Regional Visitors Authority.
This article is part of Out's Nov/Dec 2025 issue, which hits newsstands October 28. Support queer media and subscribe — or download the issue now through Apple News, Zinio, Nook, or PressReader.
