Gender, like lasagna, is often multi-layered and complex. That doesn’t mean they go together.
New Jersey pizzeria Villa Italian Kitchen, in an act inspired surely by Beelzebub himself, has unleashed gender reveal lasagna onto the world, the New York Post reports. For only $140, you can feed your family facefuls of femininity or offer them mouthfuls of masculinity. (Don’t worry, the price of the lasagna also comes with salad, which we’re sure is non-binary.)
Prior to setting their sights on Italian comfort food, gender-reveal parties have started wildfires that caused millions of dollars in damage and left parents with broken bones. Not to sound like someone’s old drunk uncle, but I remember back in my day when the cheese in lasagna was white — not blue or pink! That’s not appetizing! These kids today have no respect at all.
One dish of lasagna serves 12 people — not that anyone who would order this deserve to have 12 people come to their event.
Villa Italian Kitchen wants to make sure even those who can’t make it to a carb-filled celebration of cis-ness to feel included, so they’re encouraging those who purchase this heteropatriarchal pasta dish to share their reveals with #LasagnaReveal.
I’m not Italian, but I am from New Jersey, and I believe that most Italians would prefer lasagna made from their grandmother’s recipe. And I think most children want to reveal their own gender, thank you very much!