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A younger man smiles with his arm around an older man with gray hair and glasses.
Opinion

Go Ask Alex: How do gay millennials plan for old age without a blueprint?

With so many queer elders lost to AIDS, a generation of gay men is facing a lot of unknowns about growing older. Advice columnist Alexander Cheves looks to chosen family and community for answers.

Hank Social cofounders Eido Gat and Ido Barbibay
Print Issue

Know the data dangers of using a gay dating app

As Big Tech mines big returns on queer dating data, many are raising a red flag on privacy concerns and starting alternative ways to connect.

A shirtless man wearing sunglasses smiles while looking at his phone outdoors.
Sex & Relationships

Go Ask Alex: How do I show kink on my dating profile without scaring people off?

Columnist Alexander Cheves explains to a kinky gay man why one dating profile may not need to show every side of you.

Young male couple on riverside taking smartphone selfie with dog, Astoria, New York, USA
Sex & Relationships

Go Ask Alex: Does living in NYC make it harder to find gay love?

A gay New Yorker is exhausted by endless options and failed relationships. Columnist Alexander Cheves explains why dating in a big city may be harder — but finding someone who stays can mean even more.

A bisexual Pride flag is held alongside other LGBTQ+ flags during a community demonstration.
Sex & Relationships

Go Ask Alex: I came out as bi, and my friend called me a 'fake lesbian.' What now?

After coming out as bisexual at 40, one reader lost her oldest friendship. Columnist Alexander Cheves explains why living authentically is still worth it.

People stand beside a memorial of flowers and candles near Berlin's Brandenburg Gate after the Christopher Street Day attack.
Opinion

I survived the Berlin Pride terror attack. Don’t let the right weaponize our grief

Opinion: Berlin-based Out columnist Alexander Cheves survived the deadly attack on Christopher Street Day and rejects politicians’ attempts to exploit it.

Older adults walk together outdoors
Opinion

Go Ask Alex: I came out after retirement and lost all my work friends

Columnist Alexander Cheves helps a reader navigate the heartbreak of losing decades-long workplace friendships after coming out — and the challenge of building authentic community later in life.

A person sits on the edge of a bed and appears to be worried or deep in thought.
Opinion

Go Ask Alex: How do I leave an abusive bf when I've no money or place to go?

Columnist Alexander Cheves shares practical advice, LGBTQ+ resources, and a reminder that no one has to escape abuse alone.