1 Who will play you in the film version of your life story?
Ernest Borgnine or Rosie ODonnell.
2. Whos your childhood crush?
June Lockhart from Lost in Space. She wore that tight-fitting one-piece number.
3. Whats your most regretted fashion choice?
A two-foot-high mohawk horizontally striped with blond, red, and black hair that I had in 1986.
4. Whats your vision of hell?
Being topped in a hard-core sex scene by Ann Coulter and Cindy McCain -- all the while being watched by a mime in clown makeup playing the flute.
5. Whats the most overrated virtue?
Chastity. What else?
Send a letter to the editor about this article.