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WATCH: Rihanna Twerks And Makes It Rain In ‘Pour It Up’ Video


If I were straight, I’d be so turned on right now

Rappers and strippers, much like the relationship between the sea anemone and the clown fish or the shark and remora, this relationship is one that is symbiotic. The rapper gains status and lap dances by making it rain and the ecdysiast--that's the technical term for stripper--benefits from the recording artist's largess. For decades this relationship has been one between a male rapper and female exotic dancer. Well thankfully Rihanna's here to challenge the gender binary in her "Pour It Up" video. She's like the Susan B. Anthony of strip club equality.

In the video, a blinged-out Ri-Ri sits on gold throne, twerks, and makes it rain on some amphibious pole dancers. If you can make it though the whole thing without getting that funny feeling down below, then, congratulations, sir--you are a homosexual.

Check out the video below:

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Alex Panisch