Hello LGBT community, I need to call myself out. It's time for an accountability process, honey. Did we all know that acclaimed lesbian folk singer Brandi Carlile, who took home three Grammys last weekend, was in A Star Is Born? Excuse me?
Yes little jokers (which is what we're calling Brandi Carlile stans in honor of her Grammy-winning song, "The Joke"), Carlile appeared in Bradley Cooper's glossy melodrama, which is nominated for best picture at next week's Academy Awards. When Jackson Maine is booked to perform a Roy Orbison tribute at the fictional Grammys, where his beloved Ally is nominated for best new artist, he is bumped from singing because he is so obviously messed up on booze and pills. Jackson, whose dad has more talent in his fuckin' finger than you have in your whole fuckin' body, spaces out during a rocking rendition of "Oh, Pretty Woman," almost ruining the performance. Who is covering his ass on guitar? None other than self-proclaimed "lesbian chicken-farmer" Brandi Carlile. Reader, I am shaking.
Carlile actually spoke about her experience on set with Rolling Stone, telling them she had an uncomfortable, starstruck moment with Stefani Germonatta herself during filming. "I'm just a small-town lesbian folk singer, and I hear someone in the audience of extras yelling: 'Hi, Brandi!' The light was in my face, so I tried to smile to acknowledge that I heard it. I couldn't respond to it. I was filming; it was bizarre." The person trying to get her attention turned out to be L. Gaga herself, which Carlile's wife Catherine later chastised her for: "What are you doing standing here for the last 10 minutes snubbing Lady Gaga," she said according to Carlile, who then set out to find her trailer and apologize.
"I walk in the trailer and there's an almost-naked Lady Gaga standing there. And she goes, 'Girl!' and gives me a huge naked hug. ... I got to talk to her for awhile about being an awkward lesbian."
Ladies, I am boiling! I literally profiled Brandi Carlile for Out's March issue and had no idea I could have asked her about watching Jackson Maine piss himself. Am I cancelled? I'm cancelled.
Following her Grammys win, the burgeoning movie star was a guest on lesbian pacifist Ellen DeGeneres' talk show, where she performed a stirring rendition of "The Joke" before joining DeGeneres on those uncomfortable looking chairs for an interview. The ladies discussed Carlile's Grammys acceptance speech, which she dedicated to misfits everywhere. Carlile also thanked the comedian for inspiring her to come out.
"I basically just outlined that I came out of the closet when I was 14 years old because of you," she explained. "I never attended any parties, or was never invited to a dance or anything like that. And I said that being embraced by such an enduring and loving community was the dance of the lifetime. And it really was," she added.