In a red-carpet interview with Out at the Ali Forney Center’s annual spring gala, actress Tommy Dorfman shared an update about her recent experience being seated next to a man on a plane who spent the flight sending transphobic text messages about her to his contact list.
In videos and photos that the 13 Reasons Why star posted to Instagram on May 1, Dorfman’s first-class seatmate can be seen sending the text: “I am in the first aisle of First Class. Guess what is sitting next to me? A fucking transsexual in the midst of going from a man to a woman. Just my luck. I was hoping for a hot babe!!” The footage shows that the man sent similar texts to multiple people saved in his phone, often copy-pasted, expressing disgust toward Dorfman.
Dorfman has since taken down the post, but it initially drew widespread media attention from People magazine and other outlets. Asked by Out video correspondent Stephen Walker about the experience on Thursday night, Dorfman explained why the post has disappeared from her feed — and revealed that she has since been in touch with the man, post-internet firestorm.
“I debated posting about it and I ultimately felt like it was such a universal experience that I had an opportunity to share — and the beautiful thing is that he and I have now been in contact,” she said. “I took the post down. He has trans family members. He’s speaking with his rabbi and trying to educate himself. And I believe that.”
Dorfman initially dubbed the man an “alt-right vampire” in her caption about the experience and tagged someone she believed to be the mystery texter in the comments of the post. Although the post has since come down, Dorfman justified taking such a public approach to the problem.
“Shame isn’t always the way to go for growth, but sometimes measures have to be taken, and I forgive him,” she said, adding, “That was just a week of growth for him, hopefully.”
Dorfman was one of many celebrities in attendance at the Alli Forney Center’s “A Place at the Table Gala,” which this year raised over $3 million for homeless LGBTQ+ youth. Also in attendance were Louisa Jacobson, Cynthia Nixon, Harper Steele, and Liev Schreiber, a vocal supporter of his trans daughter Kai.
