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Dancing With the Stars returns with more Grade D celebrity goodness

The eighth season of Dancing with the Stars debuts March 9 on ABC and the names of the 13 has-been celebrities desperately trying to cling to any measly, greasy shred of fame they can by learning to (badly) tango have just been released.

Among the clumsy soon-to-be lambada-ers are comic David Alan Grier, Jackass' buffoon Steve O, Apple computer co-founder (and supposed former Kathy Griffin beau) Steve Wozniak, Former Go-Go Belinda Carlisle, actress Denise Richards, country singer Jewel (Really Jewel? You're really doing this?!) and her rodeo champion husband Ty Murray (competing separately), rapper (and Popnog obsession) Lil' Kim, perpetually sunny (and often orange-y) Access Hollywood co-host Nancy O'Dell, former New York Giants defense player Lawrence Taylor, country singer Chuck Wicks (who is dating professional dancer and two-time Dancing with the Stars champion Julianne Hough), Olympic gymnastics champ Shawn Johnson, and our personal favorite -- since there aren't any queers to root for (whoever thought we'd say we miss Lance Bass?) -- Gilles Mirani.

If you're wondering who the hell Gilles Mirani is, do the words "naked guy showering in the Sex and the City" movie mean anything to you? If not -- check out the clip below (which might not be safe for work depending on where you work). If so, you should still check out the clip below and relive the glory. Now if only we could force ABC to make this fox trot in the nude.

Previously > Another look at Lance's mad dancing skillz

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Noah Michelson