The Boys in the Band star Matt Bomer recently revealed to Attitude magazine that coming out publicly in 2012 cost him several roles in film and TV.
“I came out at a time when it was very risky to do so – I had a studio film that was about to premiere, and a television series coming out. But to me it was more important to be my almost authentic self, both for my family, and for myself,” he said. “I wasn’t trying to be a role model, nor am I now, but I thought if it could help just one person, then it would be worth it. But to say that didn’t cost me certain things in my career would be a lie. It did. To me that trade-off was worth it. But it hasn’t been some fairy tale — no pun intended.”
Bomer came out while accepting the New Generation Arts and Activism Award from the Steve Chase Humanitarian Awards. During the speech he thanked “my beautiful family: Simon, Kit, Walker, Henry,” adding, “Thank you for teaching me what unconditional love is. You will always be my proudest accomplishment."
The actor also acknowledged that even with today’s standards, despite how far we’ve come as a movement, we still have a ways to go.
“We’re living in a day and age where there are actors and athletes and public figures who are openly gay and have been unafraid to acknowledge that, but without a question, there’s a trade-off, in my experience,” he said.
In a 2017 interview with Out, Bomer revealed that he first came out to himself while performing in Romeo and Juliet and Joseph and the Amazing Technicolor Dreamcoat at the Utah Shakespeare Festival.
"I remember someone there who was a hair and makeup artist who I found really inspiring," he said. "I thought, ‘If this person can live their truth, what am I doing?'" At the time he was dating a girl.
Bomer eventually came out to his family in a letter. "I wrote a letter to my parents. I would have lost my sense of direction if I tried to do it in person," he said. "There was radio silence for a long, long time, at least six months." The silence was followed by a "blowup," but his family has since come around to better terms.
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