These Six Senior Citizens Caught Having Public Sex Are My New Heroes

We all hope that the things that make us us will stay true as we grow older, and it's true that people never really change. So hopefully, if you're sexually adventurous in your youthful prime, you'll stay that way even in the twilight of your life.

And if you're a big ol' slut, that's probably never going to change. Just ask the group of six senior citizens who were recently arrested for having group sex in a conservation area in Connecticuit earlier this month, as reported by Newsweek.

The group, whose ages ranged from 62 to 85, was discovered at the Grace Richardson conservation in Fairfield, Connecticut -- which police say is a notorious hookup spot according to a "City Hookup Guide" that can be found online. (Fairfield happens to be where my dad's family lives, so I know what I'm doing after dessert on Thanksgiving this year)

The local police department's Quality of Life Unit and the Special Services Unit had set up surveillance at Grace Richardson to catch fornicators in the act.

Of the six seniors arrested, only one was a woman, the wife of one of the men. While we don't have confirmation that things got a little gay... you do the math. According to the Out.com Slack Channel, public group sex is inherently queer, and there is no way some of these grandpas weren't bumping uglies.

And the sole woman, an 85-year-old who will remain nameless out of respect for her privacy? Well, not all heroes wear capes. Some of them are half-naked on a park bench watching their husband bracing himself on his walker as get gets the bottom knocked out of him. Allegedly.

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