How Superman inspired Frankie Grande to be Supergay!

From Broadway and Big Brother to beauty routines and Bowie-inspired glam, Frankie Grande is ready to tell his story.

In Supergay!, his new memoir, Grande revisits the many versions of himself he tried on over the years — from frat brother, to Broadway performer, to the unapologetically flamboyant star fans know today. In the excerpt ahead, he uses superheroes and secret identities to explain how he got there.

My Secret Identity: How to Just Be Really Fucking Gay

To be your best superhero, you must have an alter ego to hide behind so people can’t figure out who you are. Think Bruce Wayne, Peter Parker, King T’Challa, Steve Rogers, Diana Prince, Bruce Banner, the list goes on and on. Clark Kent isn’t gay (that we know of) but his secret identity is about as well-hidden as a flaming homo. All Clark Kent does is restyle his hair and throw on grandpa glasses and nobody has any idea who he is. And we just lean into that even though it’s absolutely ridiculous, and we can all tell that Clark Kent is Superman. Just because you parted your hair differently, we’re not supposed to know that’s you? OK. Cool. Whatever you say.

This Clark Kent phenomenon happens to gay people a lot. Even if you’re obviously gay, people just pretend you’re straight because:

They don’t want to be rude by assuming you’re gay (but guess what, it’s not an insult!);
They don’t want to out you (fair);
They don’t give AF; or
They’re super religious and are praying the gay away in their heads.

I think the LGBTQ+ community can relate to the idea of secret identities. Many of us have spent a substantial part of our lives hiding behind fake personas to get by or even stay safe. A lot of us don’t have a clue who we really are for the longest time because we’re not allowed to be the real authentic versions of ourselves.

I wasn’t that flamboyant in my younger years, emphasis on the that. I was being myself, but it was the only me that I knew how to be. When I was a child, a teeny tiny baby, I was so unbelievably inspired by David Bowie’s glam rock persona. I saw him in full-on makeup in the film Labyrinth when I was just three and even at that age was like, What the fuck is that?! (I didn’t say the “fuck” part out loud because I didn’t want my mouth washed out with soap.) I watched the movie on repeat until I could (and did) recite the entirety of Labyrinth word for word.

Even though I may have leaned a lil’ queer, I was still very bro. I had a huge Italian Catholic nose (now thrice removed, thank God 😉) and wore a huge gold cross around my neck all the time. I bro-ed out with my Sig Ep brothers. I bro-ed out with my straight best friend, Jon. I had a souped-up black Volvo (wait, is that gay?), with my 22-inch rims and two twelves in the back (never mind, not gay) and Knight Rider lights in the grille. That’s how I presented myself to the world. I didn’t know better. I didn’t know there was such a thing as gender expression or gender identity when I was young. Once I discovered I could be a flaming faggot, I was like, hmm, it me? It wasn’t a fast or seamless transition; figuring out my identity was a gradual progression. I wasn’t hiding who I truly was because I didn’t know who I truly was. I was trying to figure myself out by taking cues from the people around me — and no one around me was a certified Twinkle Toes.

I didn’t start to really flame out until college and then it quadrupled in New York City on Broadway. My best friend in Mamma Mia! was married to Kris Buckle, one of the greatest makeup artists in the world. He traveled with everyone from Christina Aguilera to Mariah Carey. He was so good, they wouldn’t let him go. Through Kris’s then-husband, I started understanding how makeup could be transformative for a man and could accentuate my masculine features as well as my feminine ones. I learned where to apply the bronzer, where to put the mascara. I didn’t know how to apply eyeliner or how to contour my face to make myself look more attractive as a male yet. But with his tutelage, I started emphasizing both my feminine and masculine characteristics. I became obsessed with the way my long, beautiful lashes look coated in Chanel mascara, and couldn’t believe I lived so much of my life not using them to their full potential. I also love my strong jaw and how it looks even stronger when contoured to the gods with bronzer. I think it’s so beautiful that I represent both sexes in my face. I emulate Bowie as much as humanly possible in my use of color and whimsy. When I sit down with any makeup artist, to this day, I say, “Let’s go Bowie. Keep the shapes Bowie, keep the style Bowie, apply the makeup like Bowie.” I want to emphasize we are not doing drag but rather glam rock, and there is just no better or more effective way to communicate that other than…Bowie.

For me, makeup is performative, makeup is expression. Makeup makes me feel confident. Strong. Fierce. Once I got a chance to embrace this side of myself, I decided I’d always go all the way — nothing halfway for me ever again! And yet when I went on season 16 of Big Brother, the undercurrent of potential homophobia must have seeped into my subconscious because I drastically toned it back. I look back on those days and I’m shocked at how little makeup I wore. Sure, I’m wearing foundation, bronzer, and concealer. But that’s it — a “no makeup” makeup look. I wore a little in the Diary Room, but it was nowhere near as heavy as I go now. I look back and think, For the love of OTEV, why didn’t you have mascara on? Your lashes are your power tool! I looked like Gollum. It could have had something to do with the severe sleep deprivation and the massive shift from cocaine to caffeine. Anyway, in response to Big Brother, I was like, yikes, and that’s when I really embraced and leaned into makeup. After that, I wore it every day. When I went back on years later for Big Brother Reindeer Games I made sure I was in full beat for every competition, of which I won the most, once again.

Continue Frankie Grande's story in Supergay!, available now from Sourcebooks and wherever books are sold.

Excerpted from Supergay! by Frankie Grande, run with permission of the publisher, Sourcebooks, ©Frankie Grande 2026

Supergay! by Frankie GrandeSourcebooks, © Frankie Grande 2026