DWTS: Showing Off New Moves

10.13.2009

By Noah Michelson

Dancing with the Stars expanded its repertoire last night with four
new dances: lambada, Texas two-step, Charleston, and bolero. I still
don't know what "bolero" means, or what it's supposed to really look
like, but the Charleston helped Clarissa, er, Melissa Joan Hart and
Kelly Osbourne rise from the ranks of the pack. Clarissa especially
needed a big win, she hasn't stood out much this season, and she
possibly benefited from being an early dancer, because the judges
started off the night inflating the grades, perhaps feeling guilty
about last week's 5- and 6-fest: but a 10? I mean, her Charleston
was good, but not really a 10, even from Bruno.

DWTS is best when you see a couple rising to the occasion and
improving each week....and also when a star is possibly on the brink
of burning down completely. Aaron Carter wept last week after his low
scores, which endeared him to Michael Irvin (I loved the footage of
them holding each other in the hallway, Michael murmuring in his ear
that he's a real competitor and that's why he cares so much), but I'm
not sure America is quite as taken with his big black hole of
emotional need. Aaron Carter wants your approval real bad, but I am
feeling less inclined to offer it each moment. If there is going to
be a shocker in this season, I predict it will be him getting voted
off earlier than expected....possibly even tonight?

Even though Mya is still holding strong at the top spot with her
baby-oil coated lambada, it was Derek and Joanna's performance of the
dance that is more memorable (see clip above). Or maybe it is just
Derek's shirtless chest. I'm glad the judges were watching the
blonde model spin because my eyes were always fixed elsewhere.

-- A. RAYMOND JOHNSON

Previously > DWTS' Surprise Double Elimination!

Tags: Popnography
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