How one gay couple found lasting love while cruising the world

“Oh, Zach, you love cruises?” “That’s cool. They’re not for me!”

More than any other category of travel, whenever I mention I love cruises, there’s always a weighted response. Often, that response is immediate rejection — folks insisting that cruising is not for them or that they’re not “the cruising type.” I get it and understand that not everything is for everyone. But let me respond from my ocean of experience as a travel writer: If you’ll allow, cruising can be an escape to joy and your portal to the world.

Check the records; you’ll see I was not smitten with cruises from a young age. My first voyage dates back to 1988 on the Big Red Boat, Disney’s initial foray into cruises from the ’80s into the early ’90s. From what I can reference from family photos and fun stories repeated over dinners through the years, I was a fearful child who did not trust the characters; I preferred combing my mother’s hair to enjoying the kids’ club onboard. In my defense, I was three. Despite my fears and anxieties, my sea legs were forming.

Travel writer Zach Laks in front of the Disney Magic cruise shipcourtesy Zack Laks

Semester at Sea, a 100-day academic adventure on a cruise ship, was where I found my heart of the ocean (see what I did there?!). The sailing university, a leader in academic adventures that gained some notoriety during the eighth season of MTV’s Road Rules in 1999, offered a 100-day, around-the-world expedition from Ensenada, Mexico to Fort Lauderdale, Florida — taking the long route. I was a budding 20-year-old, out and proud for five years. I came out at age 15 in 2000 when my best friend Jeff inadvertently expedited the end of my closeted era by revealing he was gay. It wasn’t what I’d ever expected to hear, and I knew my secret would be safe with him. Leaning on Jeff, I found the strength to come out to my family, friends, and high school classmates.

Having found confidence in myself and my identity as a gay man, I was eager to sail the world and experience its wonders. Right before the iPhone changed everything, I first connected with the world’s wonders through these voyages as I came of age: immersed in the throng of humanity on the streets of Tokyo, dancing to Madonna’s “Hung Up” in a queer underground club in Ho Chi Minh City, being the foreigner whose rarity is cause for celebrity in Yangon, and the niceties exchanged during a grueling haircut (and unexpected neck crack as if I were at the chiropractor) in Cairo. I’d arrived at these ports by ship, without jet lag, without pretenses, and with an ever-growing list of places to return.

Zach Laks and Jesse North enjoy the Bahamas while sailing the Celebrity Apexcourtesy Zack Laks

I used to collect musical theater albums, and a recurring thought I’d have was that if I didn’t have a particular album (like the 1992 Faith Prince/Nathan Lane Guys and Dolls Broadway cast recording), I knew my future husband would. Cue: “I’ll Know.” Add to that, the list of places I’d sailed and was eager to return to was being crafted with the intention that I’d bring my future husband along with me one day.

I didn’t know who Jesse was then, but the universe was taking notes. Jesse came into my life in 2011. It was the kind of meet-cute where you’re both at a birthday party in a bar in NYC, and you know you’ve discovered your person. (Cue “I’ll Know” again, please.) So imagine my delight when I meet Jesse, exchange some niceties, and then tell him I love cruises, and his first response is an unabashed, “Me too!” A few vodka sodas later…“What?! You have a Guys and Dolls tattoo?!” Jesse had that Faith Prince/Nathan Lane CD, which fit perfectly into my…er, our collection.

Zach and Jesse cruise with Disney Treasure to the Bahamascourtesy Zack Laks

Since that encounter, Jesse and I have spent the last 13 years exploring the world together. Cruises are the way for us to share the thrills of travel with all the bells and whistles these new ships offer. Do you want champagne on demand anywhere on the ship? Virgin Voyages has an app that you can shake and have bubbly delivered. Want to go skydiving? Royal Caribbean’s Quantum-class ships have RipCord by iFLY skydive simulators (I tried it, and that was good enough for me). Or how about some of the finest dining experiences anywhere? Check out Le Voyage by Daniel Boulud onboard Celebrity Ascent and Celebrity Beyond and Disney’s Enchanté by Chef Arnaud Lallement on the Disney Treasure and Disney Wish.

Since meeting Jesse, I’ve left my career as a theater producer to pursue full-time travel writing, focusing on cruises and theme parks. He has found meaning in producing breaking news videos. Planning our next cruise keeps us motivated, knowing there’s a journey ahead that will bring us to new adventures and closer together.

To date, one of my favorite assignments was covering the inaugural sailing of VACAYA, an LGBTQ+ vacation company. The little apprehension we had, doubting our need to be a part of an all-queer sailing, was erased within moments of boarding, as just about every fellow guest was eager to say hello. We soon became a part of a vibrant community of queer folks from around the world that had arrived for a week to celebrate life. We’ve been chasing that high since, prioritizing queer travel opportunities to complement our regular cruise getaways.

Jesse and Zach enjoying VACAYA's Provincetown sailing on the Celebrity Summitcourtesy Zack Laks

I understand anyone’s hesitation to set off on a cruise getaway. It’s hard to describe how much fun a cruise is and, of all things, how seamless it can be. Jesse and I will be off the ship, connecting with a new port of the world all day. Then, it’s such a convenience to retire to the ship and recharge in the comfort of our quarters before a night out at sea.

I always think about the easy flow of a cruise ship. Gliding from pre-dinner drinks at a lively bar to a fascinating conversation at a fine dining experience to a Broadway-quality show is a luxury. Ease on from there right into a few choice bets at the casino, then to a piano lounge, and maybe, if the vibes are right, on to a dance party at the club, and you’re sailing the seas in style.

So, let cruising be my escape, my preferred way of seeing the world with my husband. No marketing materials can encapsulate the joys I’ve experienced while cruising. And if you’re still a naysayer on cruises, I’d like to politely ask you to sit down — you’re rockin’ the boat.

Zach Laks is a travel writer and editor based in New York City with 10+ years of experience with bylines in 20 publications covering cruises, resorts, LGBTQ+ travel, theme parks, destination guides, and travel news.