In a video unleashed to the general public without warning on Sunday, blogger, pick up artist and author of controversial book Game Daryush "Roosh" Valizadeh warns his fellow heterosexual men to stay away from their girl's butts, lest they be tempted by her anus to go full homo.
"I officially declare myself a boob man," Valizadeh says to the camera in the video. "I am now all about the boobs, because being a butt man is just a gateway to homosexual activity."
After a very dramatic pause, Valizadeh adds, "I say no to the backhole. I've never done anal sex in my life, I swear."
He then goes on to say that some girls have asked but he has turned them down because of the "doodoo" -- yes he says "doodoo" -- that comes out of there. I would tell him about enemas, but those are gay culture and I won't let the hets have that, too!
Now, I can't stress this next part hard enough. Knowing all that "doodoo" you have in your butt, he asks, "Why am I going to put my penis in there?" But he pronounces penis with the hardest of "b" sounds. So it sounds like benis.
"If I was watching anal sex porn all day, I would do it," he says, defensively, without anyone bringing up anal sex porn. "But I don't," he adds.
The final word on this: we promise you, straight guys who might be reading this queer news website, that exploring anal sex consensually with your female partner will not turn you gay! And don't fear the "doodoo."