Sex Thimbles

We've always had a soft spot for men in uniform, and those Frenchie gendarmes occupied a special place in that soft spot, with their saucy tailoring and irresistible arrogance. And so we're a little put out by the news that in times of enforced equality, the existing (and already short) minimum height requirement of 5'3" for cops is to be dropped, in theory with no lower limits. Don't get us wrong -- a 4-foot-tall gendarme is probably as effective as a strapping 6-footer (except for looking over walls and leaping parked cars and practicing Parkour and other French cop things) and we adore little folks. But we did love those imposing gendarmes, so shed a little garlic tear this day.

The law also applies to prison guards, so there go those Oz-type fantasies too. There's something just a little less hot about a teeny sadist menacing you with his truncheon.

-- G. EARL

Previously > Emma Thompson Disses Audrey Hepburn