Loco for Coco

TRUE STORY. Two gay men recently stood in front of a newsstand in New York City, transfixed by an ass. A gigantic, superhuman, glistening ass, sitting on a chair, crack side out. The ass was bisected by a thong and attached to a bodyarms, legs, hair (shiny, bottle-blond), the appendages of a female Homo sapien tacked onto the ass like needles sticking out of a pincushion. Cocos wildest photo shoot ever, said Gay Man Number 1, reading from the cover of Black Men Magazine. Coco? Whos that? said Gay Man Number 2. A young man in a do-rag who was passing by overheard the conversation and stopped in his tracks. Yo, thats Ice Ts wife! he exclaimed, sounding a protective note. Thats Coco! Silence. Oh. Hey, thanks. The do-rag dude sauntered on, leaving the two gay men to scratch their heads and speculate on whether Mrs. Ice T had had surgical enhancement to her posterior. Coco, or more precisely, Cocos ass, may not be the gay mans cup of tea, but something about the Coco phenomenon hints at a deep-buried kinship with our straight black brothers. For one thing, theres the, um, embrace of the ass as a sexual object. Black guys are generally less inhibited about thisremember Sir Mix-a-Lot? Whats more, the sexual tastes of gay men and (straight) black men sometimes tend to the hard-to-attainfor many gay guys, its unstraightening a heterosexual man; for some black men, its snagging a lily-white blond. So much the better, then, if shes dragin [sic] some wagon or has one hell of a caboose, as one Coco fan noted on the Web.