Even Dead, Naomi Campbell Will Read You to Filth: An AHS:Hotel Recap

American Horror Story: Hotel continued its defiant strut down insanity's hallway in the third episode, featuring Naomi Campbell being stabbed to death only to come back to life and shade Chloe Sevigny, as well as the Lady Gaga Angela Bassett love scene you've always wanted. Let's hop into the crazy, shall we?

Related | 13 Times AHS: Hotel Just Really Didn't Give a F***

Naomi, taking a break from filming Wednesday night TV's other exercise in ostentation, Empire, finally got hers last night when Schmidt did what Tyra Banks only dreamed of doing in the '90s.

But Claudia Bankson was not dead for long and she found herself asking the same question I ask every Saturday night in New York.

You gotta hand it to Claudia, though, just seconds after being stabbed to death and pulling a Jesus of Nazareth, she's managed to crawl into the library and read a bewildered Dr. Alex Lowe (Sevigny) on her fashion choices.

See ya in Hell.

Meanwhile, the other most important takeaway from this episode is the introduction of Ramona Royale--a bad bitch in the Pam Grier blaxploitation mold.

She came to Hollywood with "barely a high school education and no prospects" so it wasn't long before she was a star.

You may remember Ramona from such classics as:

And my personal favorite:

Ramona met noted HBIC The Countess (Lady Gaga) in 1977--

--and it was love at first eternal gaze, leading The Countess to turn Ramona in the most practical way possible.

They had some good times--and some great outfits--they did:

But with the possible exception of The Countess, nothing lasts forever and Ramona found out what happens when you step out on her. And we found out that this HBIC is real cray. So with Ramona back in LA, it's only a matter of time before she and The Countess pick up where they left off--gold lame and cheetah print.

That's all folks!

Les Fabian Brathwaite--ex-bride of Blackenstein.