Even though the show is 70% Laura Dern staring vacantly out into the ocean while swirling a glass of wine the size of a tombstone, I'm just as excited for the next season of HBO's Emmy-winning Big Little Lies as the next person. I can't get enough of it. And we BLL fans have even more to look forward to, especially after news broke last week of three-time Oscar winner and 21-time nominee Meryl Streep joining the already-illustrious cast for the highly anticipated second season.
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Streep will play Mary Louise Wright, the mother of Perry (Alexander Skarsgard), Celeste's abusive husband who met his death at the bottom of a stairwell at the end of last season. What can we expect from Meryl Streep and the second season overall? I have a few theories and I'm here to share them with you.
1. Meryl Streep will settle into Monterrey and make her presence ubiquitously known, mostly because her house will have a 30-mile-long kitchen island.
2. We'll have the chance to learn more about Bonnie (Zoe Kravitz), especially now that she's been released from Madeline's cold grip and becomes a more active participant within the friend group by organizing yoga retreats, basket weaving, and general activities involving beads. Bonnie will also give birth to an avocado bath bomb.
3. Madeline (Reese Witherspoon) is going to spend an entire episode saying the word "harvest" into the mirror.
4. Renata. Renata, Renata, Renata. RENATA. This season promises us more golden Renata (Laura Dern) moments. The best part about Renata is that we never know which Renata we'll get: will we get a rare glimpse of warm-and-compassionate Renata or completely-losing-her-shit-at-a-Pier-1-Imports Renata. It's like Secret Santa!--but way better.
5. Meryl Streep and Celeste (Nicole Kidman) will have their inevitable encounter, which will--fingers crossed!--include an abundant amount of lip-pursing and Meryl Streep delivering her lines in an icy cadence a la Devil Wears Prada while steeping a bag of tea for 89 minutes straight.
6. There are rumored to be at least four additional new characters in addition to Mary Louise Wright, one of which will just be a Subaru Outback with a kayak strapped on top of it.
7. Season 3 will begin with a cold open of Meryl Streep stabbing someone with the prongs of her Emmy.