Clam-diggers had their time in the sun, and frankly, they blew it. Honestly, this has never been a particularly flattering look, and it still isn't. You also run the risk of having the most ludicrous tan line known to man.
2. Upturned Collar
What is it about a 'popped collar' on a polo shirt that conveys that obnoxious air of entitlement? We may never know the answer, but rest assured, if you're wearing your collar upturned, people are rolling their eyes behind your back. Trust us.
3. Daisy Dukes
Short shorts are a dangerous game, even if you have the gams to pull it off. Plus, denim shorts are still denim, so you manage to be uncomfortable and hot while looking ridiculous. Good ol' boys know to avoid them.
4. Cargo Shorts
Remember in the late nineties when every guy on the street looked like they were about to go parachuting off a bi-plane? These cargo shorts are still available in abundance, but don't be fooled. The blimpy, big-pocketed look is not a good one -- and never was.
5. Wraparound Shades
Unless you're a cyborg who's descended to Earth with the sole aim of destroying all civilization, wraparound shades are not the way to go. Opt for aviator-style shades instead.
If at all possible, find footwear that requires no socks at all. Unless you want to be mistaken for a tourist in your own town, wearing socks with flip-flops and shorts is never a good idea. If you really need them, go for half-socks or knot socks. Personally, we still prefer 'not socks.'
7. Short-Sleeve Dress Shirts
Unless you want to look like it's your first day in sixth grade, a member of AC/DC, or a Mormon, white short-sleeve dress shirts are a no-no. Roll your sleeves up for a rugged, sexy look.
8. Hawaiian Shirts
This should be a no-brainer, but we're constantly surprised at the number of guys who want to give Magnum PI a run for his money as soon as the sun comes out. Colorful shirts are okay, but Hawaiian shirts will never be stylish.
9. Board Shorts
Smash the conspiracy! While you don't have to go all-out Speedo if you feel you haven't got the body, there's no reason to drape yourself in baggy board shorts when at the beach. The tan line is a mess, they take forever to dry, and you look bedraggled when coming out of the water. Opt for a vintage trunk-style cut, or a swim brief -- if you can handle it.
Wear flip-flops and sandals on the beach, if you must. Tevas are perhaps the most cursed summer accessory of all, second only to hacky-sacks.