Can I Be Blunt? Niecy Nash

1. There's nothing wrong with you being sassy, but we got to take turns with the neck-bobbin' and finger-poppin'.

2. Stop asking straight folks what to do with your kids. Our brats didn't come with a manual either.

3. I don't care how much you love me, I don't want to be no kinda hag.

4. Can we replace fierce with something -- anything -- else?

5. Why are you so skinny? Somebody's got a secret on your side of the fence, and I need to know about it.

6. How about sharing your gaydar? When I've been smiling in a man's face for 30 minutes and then you tell me, 'He don't like you like that,' that's just mean.

7. Don't ask me where I got my outfit. I don't care how cute it is, I don't want to see it on you.

8. No, you can't ditch me to go home with him. You gonna dance with the one that brought you.

9. Gay or straight, there are only two things that'll heal a broken heart: sappy-ass music and a makeover.

10. To my nonblack gay friends, relax with the bronzer. You're leaving the house looking like a biscuit that just came out of the oven!

Nash's new show, Do Not Disturb, premieres September 10 on Fox. Her new movie, Not Easily Broken, opens September 26.

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