A Lesbian Wife Swap
By Dickson Wong
Wow. Are you serious?
Nicki: [Laughs] Yeah. We�re very both political, and the episode was supposed to come out around the time of the election, but it got pushed back. She also put up the American flag. I didn�t mind that, but I was just thinking, Couldn�t we have hung it with a flagpole instead of duct-taping it to my wall?
Were you at any point worried that Kris Gillespie would win your daughter Lizzie over, for example with Princess Day?
Nicki: [Laughs] No, not at all. I know how our life is here, although we don�t have Princess Day or whatever and we don�t have a tiara for her. We go to the movies, I take her shopping, and we do stuff together. I know the connection I have with Lizzie.
Did Kris Gillespie apologize at all after the post-swap confrontation for her hurtful accusations toward Kristine about her being a sexual predator who never should have been allowed near her children?
Kristine: No. She never apologized and she continued to say that�s what I was. The thing that appalled me was that the husband didn�t come to my defense from his wife who didn�t know me for more than 10 minutes. And he knew I wasn�t like that after living with me for 10 days. She insults me in such a cruel manner. And the kicker is that these are religious people and they live by the Bible.
Nicki: She was always pleasant to my face, but not to my back and when we shook hands she was really cold. She didn�t even apologize off-camera or say anything sincere.
How would you say your family as a whole has benefited from the show?
Nicki: I mow the grass! [Laughs] The show made it seem like I didn�t do anything, but I take care of everything inside the house. And Kris Gillespie just made me do everything. I�m also a lot less controlling now and I�ve relaxed a lot more.
Kristine: It really helped me and Nicki�s relationship in that she takes part in helping out more now. And what I�ve learned is to be a better communicator. I also appreciate Lizzie�s individuality even more, and we really want to let her explore her own individuality and become a person of her own.
Nicki: No. I don�t believe in regrets as a whole, so no.
Kristine: The whole thing� I feel foolish for doing it. I knew people were ignorant and cruel, but did I really have to spend 10 days with them? It saddens me that people are that cruel. Every time I think about Kris Gillespie, I think �Beauty is only skin deep, but ugly is deep to the bone.� That�s her.
If you could say one thing to the Gillespie family that didn�t air on the episode, what would it be?
Nicki: I really don�t have an answer to that question. But I wish for Kris Gillespie to see that show in private and let it sink in to realize who she is. I hope she�ll watch and have an opportunity to learn something from it about herself. I was initially in it to show Americans what it�s like for a lesbian couple to live with a child and how normal and boring it is�just like everyone else. But the ignorance we had to tolerate and to be up close with discrimination was kind of freaky. I�ve never felt so much like my family was attacked.
Kristine: Just that the Bible was meant to bring people together to teach love, compassion, and understanding, and it wasn�t meant to divide people and be used as a weapon. I just really wish that they could see it as that. It�s supposed to unite, not divide. Kris Gillespie did not show me any love, compassion, or understanding. Also, one of my main concerns was to represent who I am. It was time to take a stand. I tried to represent the community as best as I could and I don�t know if I did.
Well, we think you did.