YAS, QUEEN! Patti LaBelle on Dancing With the Stars Is LIFE

Patti LaBelle on Dancing with the Stars is pure joy and will simply make your life better. The legendary Miss Patti came out swinging -- or rather, foxtrotting -- in week one with hot hoofer Artem Chigvintsev to her classic, "Lady Marmalade." But her backstage antics were as fierce as her performance.

And you don't get to be a true diva by making empty threats. But in the end Artem and Miss Patti brought the house down and the crowd to their feet.

Meanwhile, whatever queen put her in this cape deserves all the awards:

Do yourself a favor and watch Patti LaBelle give Michael Sam's supple thighs a run for their money below:

Les Fabian Brathwaite, Creole shady marmalade.