Ken Butches Up

6.22.2010

By Noah Michelson

Oh Pixar, how could you? We all know Ken’s gay, and you know we know, and we know you know we know. We bought Earring Magic Ken and that whole Sugar Daddy Ken thing … you even unashamedly camped it up in the Toy Story 3 trailers.

Now, though, you try and pull the wool over our eyes with the (admittedly funny) Groovin’ With Ken short. We start out fine -- Ken lounging topless on the hood of his pink convertible, Ken dancing in what looks to be his very own private disco, showing lots of waxed chest. Then the “interview” gets all macho, when the unseen voice asks: “It must be difficult to be a guy who’s a girl’s toy?” and then follows up with: “It’s well known that most Ken owners are girls…”

Ken then drops the camp and gets surly, raging: “I’m a guy’s toy -- I’m kind of a role model!” before walking off. Oh come on! It’s all an act? OK, one assumes Mattel had more than a little something to do with it, but don’t you get it, really? ONLY WE LOVE KEN. No one else! Play nice, or we will transfer our affections back to G.I. Joe or He-Man (furry underwear are kind of a turn on, no?)

Check out our Gayest Ken Dolls slide show here.

Previously > Vanessa Carlton Comes Out of the Bi Closet

Tags: Popnography
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