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Mariah Carey Finally Getting a Star on the Walk of Fame

Mariah01x600

Meanwhile, 200 million albums and 18 number 1 hits later....

Of all the people you thought would have a star on the Hollywood Walk of Fame, wouldn't Mariah Goddamn Carey be somewhere near the top of your list? It just seems right, after all, if Godzilla, Kenny G and 300 Barrymores have stars that the elusive chanteuse would, too. But here we are in 2015 -- in what I thought was a civilized society -- and Mariah Carey is only now being honored on the Walk.

That's right, on August 5 the Hollywood Walk of Fame will honor the best-selling female artist of all time (NBD) with its 2,556th star, dedicated in front the W Hollywood Hotel at 6270 Hollywood Boulevard. Mimi and friends L.A. Reid, Lee Daniels and Brett Ratner will be on hand to help unveil the star.

So you, like I, may be wondering what took so damn long. Mariah certainly met the criteria of having "a minimum of five years' experience in the category for which they are nominated and a history of 'charitable contributions.'"

If you need a charitable contribution, just cue up "Always Be My Baby" and get the hell out of my face.

mariah carey always be my baby gif

It's the perfect song and video with Mimi just living her life on a tire swing, hanging out at Camp Mariah -- which, much like Wu-Tang, was for the kids.

Related | Mariah Carey Sings Carpool Karaoke to Her Own Hits With James Corden

And speaking of the Wu, the "Fantasy" remix featuring Ol' Dirty Bastard remains a perennial summer anthem whereas Mimi is still raking in Trump checks for "All I Want for Christmas Is You."

But Mariah isn't the only megastar missing on the Walk of Fame. According to Wikipedia:

Numerous major entertainment figures and legendary show business acts are not included on the Walk of Fame for a variety of reasons. Some, such as Julia Roberts and Clint Eastwood, have declined to participate; nominations cannot proceed without the nominee's consent. Others, such as George Clooney and John Denver, were nominated but would not agree to the mandatory personal appearance at the unveiling ceremony. Others have simply never been nominated, or do not have a nominator willing or able to pay the selection fee, or have less than the required five years' minimum involvement in their designated field. Others are merely victims of selection constraints and probability; only about 10% of nominees are selected each year.

So maybe it's all politics, or maybe Mimi really couldn't find the time these past 20 years to show up in person or generally give a fuck. It's Mariah, who knows what she's up to?

Related | The Wisdom of Mariah

Whatever the reason, soon enough you'll be able to stop by Mariah Carey's star on the Walk of Fame and pose with one finger in your ear while fluttering the air with your free hand as you hit that imaginary whistle register in the sky.

Les Fabian Brathwaite -- feeling emotions, deeper than I've ever dreamed of.

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Les Fabian Brathwaite