The Multiple Marriers


By Steven Thrasher

Rick Brown (as told to Out):

Just listening to PD, I think, Isn't he brilliant? He's just amazing.

What does he mean to me? The real easy answer is that he's company, and that's one of our touchstones. One of the earliest things I introduced him to was the musical Company, which is about relationships -- married relationships. And I told him, 'I can't hear this music without thinking about you. It's how I feel.' He's the man that I live with, and it's our day-to-day life that's important. And because he's PD, it's fascinating. There are always interesting things to do, to talk about. I love just listening to him.

We're an old married couple now. I think we've come to a point, after 18 years of just being together, that it's more than a constant kind of feeling of appreciation. What I've always said is that I'd be lost without him. He's always got this macro point of view that's always right. I'm the details person. I can set up a stereo -- that's one way we really fit together. He's terrible at the details. And so I can be of service, I can help. But he's just got this vision, which is great.

I wasn't raised to have my life have meaning. I wasn't raised to accomplish great things. But getting married, it connects me with the times, it connects me with my partner, it connects me with the movement. It's a very satisfying thing.

It's the personal that becomes the connection -- the connection to the ongoing struggle. Being a part of making a difference. Each time we get married, I think it's a snapshot of our relationship. We do have different vows, and we're at different places each time. I think of when we wrote our vows separately, and we'd both written that we hoped our lives would mean something. And for PD, for anyone who knows him, they'd expect that he'd write that. But for me, it's what I've learned from him. It's that same idea of why we're getting married again and again.

To read 23 other love stories we can't get enough of from our February 2011 Love issue, click here.