More Behind the Scout & Liz Margolies White House Wedding Proposal
By Jerry Portwood
After Scout (a trans man) and Liz Margolies (a lesbian)—he runs Network for LGBT Health Equity at the Fenway Institute; she runs the National LGBT Cancer Network—had a public engagement during the the annual White House LGBT Pride Reception, they received a lot of negative reactions.
As Scout explained in a piece in The Advocate, "When I found pictures of Liz on the Internet with the words 'cover it in gas and set it on fire,' it was not only impossible to look away but also dangerous to do so. We needed to know if and when the threats became personal. As a trans person, I’ve needed to watch out for those threats my whole life. It’s how I avoided the man with the baseball bat in Iowa and the mob in Illinois. And frankly, most of the hate was directed at me."
In an elegant bit, Margolies explains:
Being with a trans guy definitely had a learning curve for me. Mainly now, it makes me feel fiercely protective of him. I want to take on everyone who mistakes his gender. I am a mama bear like that.
Scout is the smartest person I have ever met, and I still swoon at his use of language. Sex is still amazing. Every simple act of living is an adventure when we are together. We walked the NYC Marathon last year. It took over six hours. We took our bikes to Amsterdam and rode through the pouring rain every day. We made a project of learning how to make perfect whiskey sours and peanut brittle.
Radical lesbian feminists do not believe in marriage. Children of divorced parents do not believe in forever, although they long to. My politics justified my fears of a legal commitment. I never wanted anyone cramping my style, and I didn't believe in having some stranger-judge decide if I am allowed to break up/divorce. I am skinny but I am tough. I had a child on my own with an unknown sperm donor at the time the vice president was condemning Murphy Brown for doing so on TV. I have my own business as a psychotherapist and I founded the National LGBT Cancer Network. I own my own apartment. I am staunchly independent.
Watch the video below or read the full piece about the backstory at The Advocate.