The Ballad of Gay Bobby
By Noah Michelson
And Gay Bobby’s previously very very tight friendship with THE John Gotti’s nephew, Richard Gotti (currently locked up on a racketeering felony) will have made him even more enemies, with all that implies. Though to be fair, no-one’s suggesting it was one of those love-that-dare-not-speak-its-name sort of friendships. Least of all us. But still, the thought’s there, and will have caused the young Gotti some stress, one assumes -- we’ve all seen Oz and know how easily one can be shanked.
An anonymous insider, clearly speaking the language of The Gays, said of Bobby, “He’s in an absolute state of fright. You have to understand that his partner is totally freaking out. His partner has no connection to any of this. You can just imagine how fraught the whole thing is.”
Of course it is perfectly possible that Bobby is in fact a hitman homo -- he’s 44, and divorced with two kids, it all makes perfect sense. The Sopranos had a storyline about that same thing (see above), with Vito “The Queer” Spatafore (actually he had no such nickname as he was killed soon after he was spotted in a gay bar, but it sounds cute, right?) meeting a violent end. Rather like the army’s Don’t Ask Don’t Tell policy, except more like Don’t Ask Don’t Need to Shoot You Inna Head.
Did it work? Well, Gay Bobby could have gone down for 17 years (in a manner of speaking) but was let off with “time served” despite never having been in prison. He and his partner have relocated somewhere secret, it seems, and are living peacefully.