Chloe and I stood near the "For Hair" section and made goo goo eyes. I asked her about her first memories of the East Village. "I used to drive in from Connecticut," she said, "I'd go to Love Saves the Day and hang out at St. Marks." Did you push the cube, I asked her? "Yeah, of course," she said. Now it seems like there couldn't be another interaction that could fully inhabit the mental space of douchey uncoolness. "I used to drive in from Connecticut I'd go to Love Saves the Day and hang out on St. Marks." I prepared to squirt some Coriander body wash into my ears to stop them from bleeding but, curiously, it was endearing and disarming.
Soon, Julie Chang from Fox 5 News showed up to ask Chloe for an interview. Chang's makeup seemed definitely NOT from Kiehl's but more out of some old Yiddish vaudevillian theatre. She was to be disappointed. "I don't do well in front of cameras," said Chloe. Me and Julie and the PR people kind of paused for a second and let the absurdity of the statement sink in. [NB: It's not entirely untrue, is it?] Then Chang slinked to a corner, crossed her legs and began texting for hours in a funk. Chloe went to meet up with her friends. One wore a mustache and a fedora and had tattoos. Definitely East Village.
-- JOSHUA DAVID STEIN
Previously > Quickies: Trying too hard edition