How To Get Laid

7.18.2005

By Out.com Editors

Confidence is the common denominator among guys who hook up with regularity when they're out on the prowl. Here are some tips that can boost your confidence when chatting up would-be lays'in a bar, at the Laundromat, or wherever'making you more magnetic, sexy, and successful at scoring.

Stay Positive

Nothing drags a conversation down faster than negativity. Though you may have had a rough day at the office, your houseplants all died, and your cat just used your damask chaise as a scratching post, the hot guy with his hand on your ass doesn't care. Avoid negative talk at all costs. Being wooed by a downer is tedious, irritating, and'above all'unsexy. Be positive in what you say about yourself as well. You won't be projecting confidence if you're mired in reporting that you're no good at this or you suck at that.

Naked Alone Time

A tip for developing a good body image is to spend some time alone in your birthday suit. Research has shown that being naked promotes a better body image, which, in turn, can boost your confidence, so unleash that inner go-go boy by stripping down and hanging out naked as much as you can. Guys who are comfortable with their bodies aren't always perfectly fit gym gods, but guys with a good body image don't mind being naked, or partially clothed, whenever the situation requires. By getting naked (alone at first) you'll quickly see how your attitude toward your body and your sense of your own body image can change for the better.

Thinking About Sex to Get Laid

When you're cozying up to a man you want to take home, envision the kind of hot, acrobatic, frenzied sex you want to have with him. Don't say anything about your mental gymnastic nastiness to him just yet'there will be time enough for that. Thinking about sex during the get-to-know-you session will subtly change the way your body moves, the tone of your voice, the position of your eyelids (they call them bedroom eyes for a reason). This passionate train of thought will ever so slightly influence the signals you're sending out. Not only will these vibes convey an unspoken attraction that he'll pick up on, but they'll also help keep him from thinking of you as a 'friend' candidate.

For more hints on confidence, body language, timing your flirtation, and how being too nice can kill your chances at hooking up, pick up the August issue of Out with tips from Jonathan Bass's new book, How To Get Laid: The Gay Man's Essential Guide to Hot Sex (Alyson Books).

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